A few days ago, I experienced a literal weight on my chest — no, I’m fairly certain I was not having a heart attack. The weight was a tightness above my rib cage at body mid-line. Uncomfortable, for sure.
Up to that point, my profound disappointment that my daughter’s dream was crushed had been expressed, yet not to anyone other than to her and to myself and to God. I’d certainly spoken of and written of my disappointment, but I’d not released any emotion to any one other than those three — i.e. to my self, to my daughter, and to our Lord. Speaking my disappointment to the Lord is always tricky for me — I admit that I have in the past expressed anger toward God, but this time I have held back. I feel I have no right to be angry with God, not this time! As to whether anyone ever has a right to be angry with God — well, that’s a whole other post, isn’t it?
Yesterday, at work, I spoke to someone I like very much — a fellow Christian and work colleague and friend — about my pain that my daughter’s dream was crushed; and I cried oh so briefly — just a rush of emotion and a slight watering of the eyes. Since then, the weight is lifted from my chest and I no longer feel the same sadness I did the day before.
“Carry one another’s burdens; in this way you fulfill the law of Christ.” (Galatians 6:2, HCSB) “There is no division in the body [of Christ], but that the members should have the same concern for each other.” (1 Corinthians 12:25, HCSB)
Thank You, Lord that You understand our need to express pain to one another so that we may pray one for the other. Help us to fully let go of our hurts so that You may heal us completely. In Jesus’ Name, amen.